Histology Relevance...

Okay, perhaps I've been studying too long, but the Rectal Columns of Morgagni sounds like some place a young noble hero with flowing blond manlocks would have to fight his way through to free the fair maiden from the thick longitudinal bands of the fearsome taenia coli.

And poor poor Morgagni. You're a well-schooled Italian anatomist dedicating your life to the study of the human body, and you are remembered in posterity as a developed, MUCOUSY part of the mammalian arsehole. Simply undignified.

If I ever discover some until-now unseen area of the human ass, please, oh please, just cut me the check and leave my moniker out of the naming ceremony. Attribute all discoveries to Nicholas Cage. He knows what he did.

*Addendum: Our hero has now fought his way past the Rectal Columns of Morgagni and is sneaking past the Crypts of Lieberkuhn, (Lieberkuhn apparently had a better press agent than Morgagni, though not by much) as we speak, perhaps in search of Lemmiwinks the Gerbil. Mr. Slave, how could you??