Aug 7, 2007

Final Countdown

Five hours until my flight takes off from Boston. About an hour until I'm supposed to leave, spending my last bit of time blogging and then printing out pictures so I feel less like I'm living in a hotel room.

I get in during the late afternoon, contrasted to the fairly late night last time, which will make everything easier to arrange, which is one of the reasons I scheduled things this way rather than trying for a flight that didn't require getting to Boston suicidally early in the morning, risking hitting moose, deer, and foxes on the way down in the dark.

And there's a bit of fear creeping up on me now. As I said last blog, not like before where I was paralyzed with both joy and fear, but an impending feeling of dread that comes from the knowledge that the momentum of my life is building and building. It's strange when you work your whole life for a dream, but then when you're actualizing that dream, suddenly it's a lot scarier.

There's the difficulty of leaving the ease of life here behind. Again, I have rent and electric bills, and a hundred other things that throw me right back into adulthood, albeit a scholastically protected one, which contrasts sharply to an idyllic little Americana existence of Wednesday cruise nights at the local malt shop/outdoor seafood place, BBQs with the neighbors, and car trips any and everything else.

That makes it very very difficult to leave, a summer too perfect you might say, but at the same time, this sort of fantastic comfort makes it easy to fall into a pattern that Aldous Huxley would probably attribute to vast quantities of Soma. A gram ain't worth a damn. Still, a pleasant sensation.

Saw the Simpsons movie tonight, as my last big thing for a while, and thought it was cute, plus novel that I was probably the only one in the theater that wasn't completely baked. Had dinner next door at a Chinese restaurant, probably being my last heart-stopping MSG fest for a while, and got properly lost on the way to said locations, touring northern Massachusetts and seeing a family of deer, so in all respects, I've probably done everything I set out to do this summer, but for a few things. Would have liked to get back to Boston...

But I'm Grenada bound... no way around it; it's back to the Rock for me. At least this time, I'm packing the local money, which I've somehow managed to hang onto for three months.

1 comment:

Lorrie said...

I'm guessing your back at school by now... I hope all is going well. Sorry we didn't get to talk while you were in the states. Hope to catch you soon. *hugs*